a new day

today was a new day, a fresh start. last night i cried for the first time in 4 months...well, since the day i left peru. it was a much-needed cry. it wasn't because i didn't get the job (that was only part of it), but it was because i felt neglected and trapped. i realized this is something i do to myself. being a strong, independent woman, i sometimes give off the vibe that i don't need help (or pray, or conversation, or whatever). i do things all on my own, and then after a while...it just gets old. i get lonely and complain about no one caring or investing in me. when really, i didn't ask anyone to.

the funny thing is, as i cried out to god last night, complaining that i have no one thinking about me, he heard my cry louder than ever. today i got multiple messages and phone calls of people just plain 'thinking about me'. i felt loved today. plus it was a sunny day and i ran outside around the lake again. then i sat on a picnic table and read my bible and wrote. it couldn't have been more peaceful. it was apparent people were praying for me today and god was watchin' out.

Psalm 31 really spoke to me today. here's a couple verses to leave you with.
"Love the Lord, all you faithful ones! For the Lord protects those who are loyal to him, but he harshly punishes all who are arrogant. So be strong and take courage, all you who put your hope in the Lord." (v.23-24)