Last week, best week

God has blessed me.

in processing this move and transition, the Lord has allowed me so much grace. he is teaching me so much right now, but more importantly, his timing is perfect in the emotions i am feeling thus far.

when big changes happen in my life, i tend to process them and mourn them BEFORE they actually happen. THEN when i am in the middle of the transition, i am filled with joy and excitement and have enough strength from the Lord to get through it. so, because i already mourned my goodbye for a couple weeks, i am now excited and ready. i had my goodbye party last night and i ended the night without a tear shed. also, today was my last day of work and i left there without tears as well--just excitement.

one thing i've been constantly realizing is how much easier it is to say goodbye when you are leaving for the lord and not yourself. because i know this is god's will for me to move to MN, i have no doubts, no regrets, and no reservations. it just is.

the lord revealed to me this week 2 things:
1. how much he loves me...
he has blessed me with AMAZING, beautiful weather the last week of my life here in san diego. he has also given me such rich time with friends and loved ones, with conversations and experiences i will carry with me for the rest of my life. there have been people who have expressed their love and appreciation for me who i didn't even realize i impacted. it's been humbling and amazing all at the same time.

2. "Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4
As it seems, my dreams have been coming true. but what this means to me is that because the lord is blessing me with my desires as i follow him...my desires are BECOMING his desires. that means my heart is slowly becoming more like his heart--i am slowly, but surely being sanctified through my faith in Jesus Christ. this brings joy to my innermost being. as i strive to be like Christ, i fail and struggle every day--but when he blesses me to see some evidence of sanctification, my heart soars!

God is really so good to me--even in the craziness of moving.

Good day

boy, have i felt overwhelmed lately! with preparing to move, finding a replacement for my job and my house, planning for the holidays, and searching for housing and jobs in minneapolis, i have felt defeated almost daily. SO, i decided i must take it one day at a time and focus on the lord through out that day, and all will fall into place. after all, we are not even guaranteed tomorrow anyway.

surely, as i have been learning to do this, things are coming together. saturday was a break-through day, and so was today. i now have a place to live when i get to MN in january...what a huge burden lifted! i also have registered for classes and am all set with those. i start january 13th. i am getting more and more excited as the time draws near.

i will be taking:
The Pleasures of God
Theological Foundations 1
AND
The Pursuit of God's Glory in Salvation

now my focus is finding a job. god is really so good to me and continues to provide EVERYTHING i need, so i have no doubt in my mind he will provide a job in his perfect timing. i am in awe of the way he takes care of me. his mercy is so great. i am truly honored to be his servant and to be on this adventure. i don't desire to be anywhere else but here, in his will. god is so good. and today, today is good as well. this is the day the lord has made and i will rejoice and be glad in it.

Loved into humility

in the last few weeks i have really been processing my move and 'life-change'. with that has come many tears, a lot of joy, and quite a bit of sadness. i've started saying goodbye in my own way by intentionally spending one-on-one time with specific people.

just the other night, after i spent time with one of my friends, i was moved to tears and humility as i realized how much i am loved here.

you see, everytime i leave a place, i assume i will not be greatly missed--things will just go on as they did before i showed up. i'm not sure why i assume that, but i always have. but this time, something is different. i am not just leaving a place or a person--i am leaving a family and a season of life. in the past few weeks, i have literally had people beg me to stay. the feeling of being loved and needed is one i cannot explain...

so, in my tears, i realized how much the lord blesses us through relationships and other people. god is love. so any love i experience here on this earth is of him. HE sent these beautiful people to love me because HE loves me. in their love for me, i experience god's love for me...and that just blows my mind. i was humbled beyond belief to know i am so loved. i don't deserve it...none of us do, but our god loves us so much that he will not give us what we deserve, instead he gives us love--unfailing love.

in my joy and sadness, i am loved into humility.