i just returned from my trip to bolivia and lake titicaca. i have to say it was the most beautiful sight on earth...that i've seen so far. the Andes mountains took my breath away and lake titicaca was better than an oasis in a desert. for people who can never decide between the beach or the mountains, lake titicaca is the place to be because it's an ocean in the middle of a bunch of mountains.
one evening we climbed a mountain, which overlooks the lake and has the stations of the cross on the hike up. it was the most intense hike ever. as i walked up the mountain and read each station, i contemplated on the passion of our christ. taking breaks on the way up and overlooking the lake or the city behind us was really unbelievable. to know that the god of the universe created that view for me to enjoy just blew my mind...then contemplating on his sacrifice for me blew my mind even more. when we made it to the top of the mountain, our group of 11 read vesper prayers as the sun set. as soon as we finished the wind picked up and the clouds grew dark. we prayed it wouldn't start raining until we got back to the hostel...sure enough, it didn't.
our trip has too many things that happened to explain in this blog, but i'll give you a few. we all got sick (and some of us are still sick), i got my knitting needles taken away from me at the airport, we got left behind by our bus on the bolivian-peruvian border, and much more. we visited our friends in bolivia who are also part of Word Made Flesh. their ministry is in El Alto, right outside of La Paz, and they minister to our friends who prostitute. they have a center one block away from the redlight district. i learned a lot about their ministry and god really broke my heart while i was there. i met a woman who had been a prostitute for 30 years and is now living with two of the missionaries there and has completely changed her life around. she reminded me of my friend from L.A. who has a very similar story. it was amazing to hear more about the redemption of our lord.
another thing that really stuck out during the trip was how the shoe shiners differed from bolivia to peru. the shoe shiners in bolivia are seen as the lowest people in society. they wear ski masks to cover their faces while they shine shoes. it was so sad to see so many people ashamed of their jobs, jobs that keep them alive, jobs that are a service to tourists and people with shoes nice enough to shine...it broke my heart NOT to see their faces. while being here i've learned to put names and faces to poverty because i have met and become friends with so many of those who live in the midst of it. i want to continue to do that, but it's so hard when society tries to cover it (the problem) and them (the faces) up.
now that i'm back in lima and i only have 3 weeks left, i'm trying not to check out. it's been hard to keep my mind and soul focused on the here and now--especially when i'm so excited to come home and see you beautiful people. so prayer for my focus here would be much appreciated. i'm trying to love with all i have for the next 3 weeks and i'm trying to process the last 4 months, but i know that even processing is a process (ha) and it will take a long time. i get back december 16th for all of you who want to know. we watched Elf last night and got me really excited about christmas. god is good and life is short, i'm learning to live it to the fullest. i'm learning to touch the clouds.
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Monday, November 12, 2007
retreat with the boys
let me try to break down last week for ya. all of us were burnt out and stressed out before the retreat, but it ended up going really well. we went to a beautiful place called camen, in the middle of a bunch of mountains. there was a river, green trees, beautiful flowers, and an amazing view of the mountains everywhere we looked. the boys seemed to really love it.
we had planned a bunch of activities and games for the boys, but it didn't go exactly as planned. the 3 days we were there ended up being really free. everyone kind of did their own thing. some boys went hiking with some staff, others went down to the river, some did art, and some swam in the swamp pool. it was super amazing to see these kids, who live on the streets and have to watch their backs at all times, relax and get to just be kids for a while. it was really great to get to know the kids a little more and to see their true personalities come out when they were able to kick back. some of my favorite times were just sitting back and watching the boys interact with each other. on the last night we were there, the boys played peruvian hide and go seek...which is a little different from the hide and go seek we know. basically there were 2 people who were it and the goal of the game was to beat the 'it' person back to home base. so basically, all the boys found the worst possible places to hide that were close to home base. we (some staff members and i) were laying on a blanket watching the game, and at one point 4 of the kids jumped on the blanket with us...eventually we figured out that was their 'hiding place'. ha. it was a little bit ridiculous, but super hilarious.
one of my favorite moments was at 8 o'clock in the morning when i was sitting on a rock by myself staring at the mountains, and one of the boys came and sat next to me. we both just marvelled at the beauty of the mountains and sat in silence for a while. then he talked about the jungle where his grandma lives and we just talked for a bit. that moment with him was one that i will never forget. i'm so glad we could both be removed from the noisy streets of lima and just marvel at god's beauty in nature...together.
when the retreat was over, we rode a 2 hr bus ride back to lima. on the way i saw people farming by hand, and by horse and plow. the beauty and simplicity of life here left me in awe for the remainder of the bus ride. it got really difficult when we had to drop the kids off. i knew we could go back to our houses and take showers, eat food, and sleep in a bed, but for the boys, they just were back on the streets. i'm still asking god questions about his justice in this injust world and learning lots. as hard as it was to drop them off back on the streets, i'm so glad and feel so blessed to have had that time with them off the streets where they could experience the beauty of god's creation. i'm so blessed to be a part of their lives and i can't wait to see them tomorrow again.
these boys have so much to offer the world...if only they had a chance.
we had planned a bunch of activities and games for the boys, but it didn't go exactly as planned. the 3 days we were there ended up being really free. everyone kind of did their own thing. some boys went hiking with some staff, others went down to the river, some did art, and some swam in the swamp pool. it was super amazing to see these kids, who live on the streets and have to watch their backs at all times, relax and get to just be kids for a while. it was really great to get to know the kids a little more and to see their true personalities come out when they were able to kick back. some of my favorite times were just sitting back and watching the boys interact with each other. on the last night we were there, the boys played peruvian hide and go seek...which is a little different from the hide and go seek we know. basically there were 2 people who were it and the goal of the game was to beat the 'it' person back to home base. so basically, all the boys found the worst possible places to hide that were close to home base. we (some staff members and i) were laying on a blanket watching the game, and at one point 4 of the kids jumped on the blanket with us...eventually we figured out that was their 'hiding place'. ha. it was a little bit ridiculous, but super hilarious.
one of my favorite moments was at 8 o'clock in the morning when i was sitting on a rock by myself staring at the mountains, and one of the boys came and sat next to me. we both just marvelled at the beauty of the mountains and sat in silence for a while. then he talked about the jungle where his grandma lives and we just talked for a bit. that moment with him was one that i will never forget. i'm so glad we could both be removed from the noisy streets of lima and just marvel at god's beauty in nature...together.
when the retreat was over, we rode a 2 hr bus ride back to lima. on the way i saw people farming by hand, and by horse and plow. the beauty and simplicity of life here left me in awe for the remainder of the bus ride. it got really difficult when we had to drop the kids off. i knew we could go back to our houses and take showers, eat food, and sleep in a bed, but for the boys, they just were back on the streets. i'm still asking god questions about his justice in this injust world and learning lots. as hard as it was to drop them off back on the streets, i'm so glad and feel so blessed to have had that time with them off the streets where they could experience the beauty of god's creation. i'm so blessed to be a part of their lives and i can't wait to see them tomorrow again.
these boys have so much to offer the world...if only they had a chance.
Friday, November 2, 2007
reaching
i haven't written a lot lately because i just haven't had much to say. living in community has been really frustrating but i've been learning a lot about myself because of it. i feel like god is doing a lot in me while i'm here...in fact, i feel like this trip was less for me to serve others and more for god to really work in my heart on a lot of things.
service looks different every day here. the other day i washed 7 huge blankets by hand for our campamento for the boys. as jess and i washed, we realized that the kids would probably never know we washed these blankets for them. at the time i didn't think anything of it, until we were done. i realized that washing the blankets and not getting recognized for it is the best service there is. i had this odd joy while washing these heavy blankets and all i could do was thank god that i had the opportunity to serve in that manner.
at times when i want to go home and escape community, god reveals to me that it's worth it. it's worth it to love someone who can't love back, it's worth it to do things that are unnoticed but make a difference, it's worth it to stay when everyone else leaves. last night i wrote down a bunch of truths that i feel i don't hear often enough. things i needed to hear, promises i needed to claim as my own. i wrote that i am a child of god and that i can ask anything in christ´s name and be heard by the god of the universe. i just kept on writing...there are so many things that get drowned out by the hum of this busy world. when we forget the truth, it's easy to lose hope. but when we speak truth and fall into god's word, as if it is our world, we remember that time here is only temporary and that god sees our hearts when no one else gets it.
as i seek the lord for my future, i find him calling me to something much more difficult than my time here. i feel him calling me to a life of surrender, daily surrender. i know that the life i live, in community, will be a life of love...but with love comes pain, suffering, joy, and life. i have an opportunity to go to africa for a year after i get back from peru. i'm really wrestling with god on this subject, but i really feel him calling me to the orphans and widows of this world. i feel him calling me wherever he wants me...right now that's peru, soon it is somewhere in the states, and then maybe africa. i know my life will never make sense when following christ...but love doesn't have to make sense, it just needs to be done. i serve a god called love, and love is needed everywhere. i don't need any more reason than that. so as i reach for this love here, i'm being changed and formed and molded. i am in process. reaching for the next step. reaching for him.
service looks different every day here. the other day i washed 7 huge blankets by hand for our campamento for the boys. as jess and i washed, we realized that the kids would probably never know we washed these blankets for them. at the time i didn't think anything of it, until we were done. i realized that washing the blankets and not getting recognized for it is the best service there is. i had this odd joy while washing these heavy blankets and all i could do was thank god that i had the opportunity to serve in that manner.
at times when i want to go home and escape community, god reveals to me that it's worth it. it's worth it to love someone who can't love back, it's worth it to do things that are unnoticed but make a difference, it's worth it to stay when everyone else leaves. last night i wrote down a bunch of truths that i feel i don't hear often enough. things i needed to hear, promises i needed to claim as my own. i wrote that i am a child of god and that i can ask anything in christ´s name and be heard by the god of the universe. i just kept on writing...there are so many things that get drowned out by the hum of this busy world. when we forget the truth, it's easy to lose hope. but when we speak truth and fall into god's word, as if it is our world, we remember that time here is only temporary and that god sees our hearts when no one else gets it.
as i seek the lord for my future, i find him calling me to something much more difficult than my time here. i feel him calling me to a life of surrender, daily surrender. i know that the life i live, in community, will be a life of love...but with love comes pain, suffering, joy, and life. i have an opportunity to go to africa for a year after i get back from peru. i'm really wrestling with god on this subject, but i really feel him calling me to the orphans and widows of this world. i feel him calling me wherever he wants me...right now that's peru, soon it is somewhere in the states, and then maybe africa. i know my life will never make sense when following christ...but love doesn't have to make sense, it just needs to be done. i serve a god called love, and love is needed everywhere. i don't need any more reason than that. so as i reach for this love here, i'm being changed and formed and molded. i am in process. reaching for the next step. reaching for him.
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