falling apart...

possibly some shocking news to some of you...
1. i'm moving to minnesota
2. in like a month
3. everything is falling apart

about two weeks ago, i visited john piper's school (bethlehem college and seminary) in minneapolis. for quite some time now i have been praying about going back to school for biblical studies. i knew the lord was leading me in that direction but i did not know exactly when. well, i loved it and now i'm going next semester. once again, i'm picking up and moving across the country with no place to live and no job. not the smartest decision in the world's eyes, but who says i am of this world?

since the lord confirmed that is where i am to be and i have started to take steps toward it (i.e. quitting my job, finding someone to live in my room, etc.), i have been attacked. i knew that this was coming. i know that when you follow the lord you are more susceptible to attack, but there has been some low blows lately. i guess i forgot how much worse it has to get before it gets better.

for starters, the week i returned home we had a major roommate issue, causing us great difficulty in paying november rent. then i got food poisoning and threw up more than i ever have before in my entire life. then there was work drama (which is still not resolved) that i must deal with on a daily basis. then my iPod broke--the week of my race (yay for running 13.1 miles without music!). then to top it all off, my computer crashed on me today. i don't think i'll be able to recover anything.

so, today as i evaluated a few things, i realized i am EXACTLY where i'm supposed to be. it just so happens that i am reading Job in the midst of all this as well as doing a bible study on joseph and him being sold into slavery, betrayed and thrown into jail, etc., etc.
is this a coincidence? no. it is the absolute providence of god. the lord is allowing these things to happen to me so i will be refined in the fire. i'm overwhelmed with all of this, not to mention uprooting and moving to a foreign place, yet i am overjoyed in knowing this is the will of the lord.

"Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed...So then, those who suffer according to God's will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good."
1 Peter 4:12-13, 19

i will rejoice.